graspTHEsanity

Open Box

She eats a few raspberries and it’s early spring, but she wears that dress, even if it has a black outer layer, I still just see the white, maybe to see some irony with the awaiting wedding we all avoid and how she just wonders around the house, trying to get mascara right for the first time in years and I just watch the girl struggle, sometimes just looking up.

I feed her a raspberry, she opens her mouth to swallow.

“What do you want to do today?” I ask her, washing my hands off the raspberry with her tongue on my finger, I lure it out and her eyes just hold my gaze stronger.

“Nothing.” And her nothing hangs in the air as she washes more raspberries and the whole weight of groceries lately is just raspberries, maybe because it’s the only fruit she doesn’t see at the Hince’s.

4 notes | reblog

Drumroll

I think I was suffocating that night.

I just recall laying in bed and watching the lights hum slightly as day and night seemed to shift, alcohol was wearing off, insomnia dancing and no reason to wake tomorrow were just keeping my eyelids firmly open.

There is a buzzing in my head as I think I am getting questioned and the fact that there were drugs on the table near the bed mattered and a quick nod to the same officer did nothing.

57 notes | reblog

Two inhaling old ladies

Two silver stars, one on the way out and one on the way back and I don’t step on either of them.

I’m wearing too much white as the whole sky which could be if you erased everything around and I keep getting it it all over a massive stab in the back of the body which just immerses itself into the blood and travels demanding a body or rather warmth which is gone over all the years and just sometimes only on death anniversaries the bones are reminded of living along with random people walking around in Nirvana hoodies.

1 note | reblog

Ian’s Ghost

I don’t really end up believing in ghosts, even when I am drunk.

But I still see him a few times, just as miserable, something in the body already, he doesn’t do anything, you can feel some notes of vinyls coming out and he fades out as soon as the table is taken.

17 notes | reblog

Fiji4

I could actually see him in my future, I could see us in his London apartment, I could still see him excitedly knocking on the window, that scene makes me grin so much that I wish I could hide behind a curtain of waves, but I don’t, I just show how interested I am until I can leave.

I come back to Jamie’s to see him shirtless, playing the guitar, smoking, eyes closed, hair longer than my own and I hug him from behind. He stops playing just to lean back and nuzzle my neck with his nose.

20 notes | reblog

Pulse Home

When you fall asleep on the train you think of the streets rather than the train and the people and the faces and all the imagery outside leaking into your mind.

And then your sleep seems like lucid dreams of streets with girls in plastic heels walking around your head with cigarettes and american smiles.