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I feel like I’ve got a gun pressed to me head and I feel the steel, but when I open my eyes all I see is Matt’s curious eyes and I shoot, not to miss, they should really make a rule not to let us shoot stuff and we get friendly reminded that once you win a prize, you get the fuck out. I hand Matt the teddy bear as he smirks and squeezes it so that it has an even more beaten up face, some twisted irony since we’re close to war,
I try to shrug the thoughts off. There’s too many. I don’t even know what to say, so I ask the obvious, hoping that once I start, it’ll be easier.
“I didn’t see your carrier, actually any carrier.” I smile. It’s hard to ignore weapon focus.
“Oh. I just had to fly here, pretty much. Staying at the NAS for a few days.” I can’t help but hold my smile and I feel guilty that I had agreed to spend my day with Julian and we have even made out in the cinema and it’s funny how back then I was content with his lips on my own and now with Matt in front of me in flesh, my mind is playing tricks on me as we just wait for Julian and my mind keeps racing, I have no idea how well can Julian keep things up his sleeve and if I should buy him cotton candy, like a schoolboy covering up his crush.
In the end the younger sailor joins us with a big grin and nods at the teddy bears we had won, Matt had his teddy tucked into the hem of his shirt, something peculiarly criminal now seeming out of that bear as I just held mine. It doesn’t take him long to stand in the queue to earn his own and I think both me and Matt feel bad for keeping ours, but I offer mine when he’s halfway through the queue as Matt seems to be distracted with his cigarette box. He offers all of us one. We’re far too silent, maybe he’s curious if I had gotten the job after all, I’m not sure he’s gotten my letter. Actually, I’m sure he hasn’t.1 notes